February 26, 2010

Back in Hong Kong

Wow, we are back in Hong Kong and it feels strange to be here and not call it home. There will always be a soft spot in our heart for this city. I feel like I'm dreaming. I keep questioning if we're really here and this is all really happening. We already had xiao long bao and dan dan mian for dinner.

After waiting 3 1/2 years for a baby, we just can't believe that there are only two days left of just the two of us. Sometimes ignorance is bliss...I think it is good that I don't really know what I'm in for. I just hope Eva Mei will like me.

February 14, 2010

Brilliant Glory

This past week has been overwhelming. I have been blown away by God’s mercy and grace. He truly gives good gifts to those he loves. Have you ever received anything from someone and not expected it? I have, and then I feel bad because I don’t have a gift to give them or I think a dumb thought like, I don’t deserve this. But, if you’re the giver and you surprise someone with an unexpected gift, don’t you just love to see the look of childhood on their face that says, oh goodie a present. In China, it is impolite to open a gift in front of the giver and I hate that. It’s supposed to help save face when the receiver doesn’t like the gift and doesn’t want the giver to know it. And I suppose it shows restraint on some level, but I think it’s bad for both parties. If it’s a good gift (no re-gifting please), how exciting it is for both the giver and receiver to celebrate the exchange of love openly.

Well, this week God was showing off His unconditional love for me. I started the week off looking for furniture for our new home, of which is a miracle in itself. Not only did Jason agree with all my selections (another miracle) everything we ordered was in stock. Wednesday we got our I-171H which is our post-fingerprint form from the US government that gives us permission to adopt an international child. The very same day, we received our travel invitation from the Chinese government. Now, what are the chances of receiving the final two documents for our adoption on the very same day from two different countries? I tell you only a God-chance! Friday was the capstone, the cherry on top, the piece de resistance. I got THE call from our agency – our Gotcha Day would be March 1, 2010. We would be traveling in two weeks. Labor has started. My pupils are dilated. Delivery is upon us. As if that wasn’t enough, Jason received an unexpected bonus at work and I received diamond stud earrings for Valentine’s Day. Did you hear me ladies? Diamond studs – Not CZ! I think to myself, I’m so happy for me.

As I sit back and take in everything that has happened this week, I’m awestruck by God’s love for lil’ ol’ me. I realized how awesome He is, which sounds obvious, but you can know about someone, but until you really experience their friendship and love, how can you really appreciate them? That is how I feel about my Heavenly Father. I desire to know Him better and then when He reveals Himself to me, I’m overwhelmed by His glory. Our human brains just can’t grasp the wonder of Him and in fact, we cannot live in the presence of his full glory because it is just too much for us to take in. We cannot look at the brilliance of the sun without going blind, so it is with God. I think God is constantly restraining Himself because we can’t handle His fullness, not because He doesn’t want to bless us.

In Exodus 33:16-23 Moses asked God, “What else will distinguish me and your people from all the other people on the face of the earth?"
And the Lord said to Moses, "I will do the very thing you have asked, because I am pleased with you and I know you by name."
Then Moses said, "Now show me your glory."
And the Lord said, "I will cause all my goodness to pass in front of you, and I will proclaim my name, the Lord, in your presence. I will have mercy on whom I will have mercy, and I will have compassion on whom I will have compassion. But," he said, "you cannot see my face, for no one may see me and live." Then the Lord said, "There is a place near me where you may stand on a rock. When my glory passes by, I will put you in a cleft in the rock and cover you with my hand until I have passed by. Then I will remove my hand and you will see my back; but my face must not be seen."

This week I felt like Moses because the Lord showed me unrestrained goodness. My face is reflecting His glory and it makes me want to brag about how good my Daddy is to me.

February 9, 2010

Jesus has a car wash

Have you been distracted lately? I have to admit that my mind has been wondering on many things – where to live, the adoption, packing, unpacking, finding furniture, the budget, learning Chinese and sign language; the list goes on and on. Yet, Jesus tells the fretting Martha, “You are worried and upset about many things, but only one thing is needed.” He was referring to himself as the One Thing.

Over the last couple of weeks God has been talking to me about this. “Be still.” “Stop doing and start believing.” “Keep your eyes on Me.” Well, the latter came with a picture. Sometimes when God speaks to me it is through my thoughts, friends, or books, but this one was a vivid picture.

I saw myself driving into our local car wash, the kind that you drive into and put the car in neutral and the wheel is grabbed by the automatic conveyor. In my vision, the man directing me to steer into the guide rails was Jesus. He was looking right at me with His hand up, waving me to go a little to the left and then a little to the right. He was showing me that if you keep your focus on Him, he will direct your path. And the cool thing about it was that if you stay on the path He has planned for you, you come out clean and shiny from His glory. And my car wash puts fragrance in their soap, so you can smell it as you go through the car wash so “we are the pleasing aroma of Christ.” “And all these things will be given to you as well,” if we just focus on Him first! So, forget all the distractions and look at the One Thing that is needed.

Reference: Luke 10:41, Psalm 46:10, 2 Corinthians 2:15, Luke 12:31